Holy shit, you guys. It’s almost September, which means it’s almost fall, which means summer is finally almost fucking over. Have I mentioned how much I hate summertime? Because I hate it so, so much. So. Fucking. Much. To celebrate the end of this shitty, swampy season — and just because it’s a thing I do every month — here’s your printable September 2017 calendar, available now as a free digital download. Can you believe I was able to stop scratching my mosquito bites long enough to put it together?
Anyway, even though I have a new shitty printer, I’m keeping it black and white, just like last month. But if you’re into coloring, you can color it in yourself with colored pencils or fine-point markers or whatever. So it’s like therapy. Therapy that will keep you organized. And it’s fucking free. FREE!
The only catch is that you need to “buy” the digital file from my store. But you don’t have to pay any money or give any credit card info or anything like that. Still, sorry. I promise I won’t sell your email address, or stalk you (unless you’re really cool), and you can even give me a fake phone number and mailing address if you want. Of course, if you do that you’re going to be sorry when I turn into Oprah and start sending everyone free bottles of whiskey and fancy lipstick mirrors. I just need to track downloads, and maybe someday I’ll even send a newsletter. (Do people even still open those?) Also, I think if you create an account it makes it really easy to download it next time.
In exchange for this free item from my shop, the only thing I ask (other than giving me every detail about your damn life) is that you follow me on Instagram. It’s about to get fall AF up in there. Like, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday and also the official holiday of Festive AF. So just you wait. Here’s the link one more time in case you missed it, and now you may carry on with downloading your very own printable September 2017 calendar.
And, really, don’t forget to follow me on Instagram. (We’re on the honor system here. Don’t be a dick.)