Friends, I don’t want you to be alarmed, but I made a mocktail. And, no; I’m not pregnant. I mean, I have been, and when I was, I drank the shit out of this thing. But people keep asking me, “Hey, what’s that mocktail you couldn’t stop talking about when you were knocked up?” So this one’s for the preggos, the teetotallers, and anyone else who might need a little break from alcohol.
While it may just look like a beautiful cup filled with ice water and a lime wedge, this drink is actually full of tropical flavor. And bubbles! (I fucking love bubbles.) I realize that’s not entirely seasonally appropriate, but you’ll thank me this summer when you remember you have the ingredients stashed in your kitchen.
If you’re not familiar with Som, it’s basically a shrub — which is a (usually) fruit-flavored syrup with vinegar. Except it’s, like, the best shrub in the world. If you’re not familiar with Pok Pok, you should be; it’s a ridiculously amazing Thai restaurant started in Portland by a white guy who’s a total cat lady.
Som isn’t super easy to find if you live anywhere other than Portland or LA or New York (and that’s only a partially educated guess) so you may need to order it online. It’s worth it; trust me. Now, if you don’t know how to get your hands on some La Croix and a lime, why are you even here? Go home.
Anyway, if you’re still with me, I call this drink a Poktail Mocktail because I like alliteration and silly word play. But that’s a pretty shitty name and I know it. (If you have a better one, leave it in the comments, please and thank you!).
2 to 3 ounces Ginger Som
Coconut La Croix
Add the Som to a stemless wine, double rocks, or Collins glass, then add a handful of ice. Top it off with the La Croix and a squeeze of lime, then drop the lime in the drink. Give it a quick stir and enjoy.
ALTERNATE POKTAIL MOCKTAIL COCKTAIL
Of course, this doesn’t HAVE to be a mocktail. In fact, you just have to add two ounces of booze to take it from virgin to… not? I guess, technically, rum is the appropriate liquor here. But I say fuck convention and put whatever you want in there. If Bacardi makes you barf like a teenage girl after her first bottle of Boone’s Farm, then put some fucking whiskey in there. Or vodka. Or whatever floats your tiny umbrella.
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