A Not-Shitty Daiquiri — With Rhubarb!

posted in: Cocktails


I’m a little ashamed to admit this, but when I think of daiquiris, I think of what is basically the grown-up version of a Slurpee machine. Because where I come from, daiquiris most definitely come out of frozen drink machines. Probably with some mold, and hopefully with at least a little cheap-ass rum to kill all of that fungus and bacteria and shit. Oh, and they’re red. So, so red.

But a few years ago, I watched bartenders I respect put daiquiris on their menus. And, honestly, I got all judgy for, like, 30 seconds, but then I thought they probably knew something I didn’t. Which turned out to be very true.

A daiquiri, by definition, is just a cocktail made with rum, lime juice, and simple syrup. Even though I’m not a huge rum fan, that sounds pretty great. Because what’s better than sweet, tart, and boozy? (Not very many things. The answer is, “Not very many things.”)

So, in my ongoing quest to put rhubarb syrup in whatever I can this spring, I decided I’d try making a rhubarb daiquiri. And — like everything else that’s been touched by the magical pink elixir — it was amazing.

Now, I’m pleased as punch to share with you my not-shitty rhubarb daiquiri recipe. But first, a tip (one I shared on Instagram yesterday).


Did you know that a cocktail strainer fits perfectly in the top of a wide-mouth mason jar? Well, now you do. You’re welcome.

Okay, the recipe.

Rhubarb Daiquiri


2 ounces white rum
1 ounce fresh-squeezed lime juice
1 ounce rhubarb syrup (see below)


Add all ingredients to a cocktail shaker (or even better, a wide-mouth mason jar) with a handful of ice. Shake really well — like, until the jar gets all frosty and shit — then strain into a coupe glass.


Yield: 2 cups


5-6 cups rhubarb, cut into ½-inch pieces
2 cups sugar
2 cups water
2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar
Pinch cinnamon
Pinch cardamom


Add the rhubarb, sugar, and water to a medium-size pot over medium to high heat, stirring occasionally. Once it reaches a boil, reduce the heat to a simmer, and add the vinegar, cinnamon and cardamom. Stir, then let the mixture simmer for at least 30 minutes, or up to an hour. The longer it simmers the more syrupy it will become.

Strain into a bottle or mason jar and let it cool to room temperature, then seal and refrigerate. This will keep in the fridge for weeks. But you’ll probably use it all before that. (Also, the mushy stuff leftover in the strainer makes a really great rhubarb jam.)

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I love good whiskey, bad words, red lipstick, and black paint.
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